Cowboy

Today is my cowboy's death day.  It's been 7 years since we lost him. (That makes him sound like a misplaced toy. And I start to cry thinking about it.) It's so much more than that... he's so much more than that. I have no words to explain this loss has done to me...to my family. It has changed us all.

It's interesting how today creeps in on me now, after 7 years. I always think I'm fine. I keep busy and then I have moments like this where it hits me.

My top 10 favorite things about my cowboy, in no particular order:
1. He was.
2. He was so easy to love.
3. Just by being,  he changed people's lives.
4. He loved strongly. (Horses, Bear, Pa-paw, Grammy, westerns... there's too many things to list)
5. He was mine.
6. All he went through didn't steal his joy.
7. His favorite thing to do when we got home was kick dust in his boots.
8. He loved the color green but not green food.
9. He was fast like a cheetah.
10. Toward the end,  when he was still practically paralyzed on one side of his body, he would crawl through the house to find me just duo he could tell me he loved me. I must've heard it a thousand times.
11. He loved Santa Claus. (Obsessively watched the movies and found him in Ralph's one day.)

I know that's 11. There are so many more. Yes, I'm crying. Yes, I will always miss him this way.